autumn fires

i'm lost and blown away
carry me home
scar tissues, purple and blue
mama's kisses don't make them good now.
battle weary beliefs
how long will i carry their torn banner
autumn fires
make me think about you
and i don't even know your name.

bitters

In the twinkling of an eye you realize his hollowness, a peculiar feeling. It is not a punch in the stomach. It is not an icy slap of water in your face. What it is is a brand new day, unsullied by illusions: unexpected and in your face like daybreak over the ocean.

The sameness of his talk and you gag your scream, it will not help. The smallness of his heart and you are left holding barrenness. Your mistakes: your errors of judgment, your failings, your fall...all so clear now. All the excuses you made for him when others pronounced him guilty are now vacuous billboards along the stack of drained words. Resentment crows over the horizon, a sour taste, a feeling beyond hate. What is that feeling? You try to figure out the deafening, demeaning silence in your heart but there is no understanding yet.

But the odd part is you have brought into being tranquility even though you are sorry that dawn was late in coming. Stray tears, a prayer for forgiveness, for refuge and sanctuary and still your quiet waters remain untouched by regret.

tap-tap-tap-tap

everything dissolves like sweat on tar. the sun is on my back and you. you don't know who i am. i want you to know. you burn me and so the sun too. too bright to see anything. maybe the clouds will take your shine away. i turn around to face you, my eyes are barely open and my heart too. come back another day, mabye you will come back another day. i hope but i don't say. grimy tears and sweaty hands, i say i'm just running a fever today. it must be the damn weather you say.

you. just an insignificant detail of my life. passing and losing relevance with each day but some days go by slowly and some days don't go at all.

sunday blessings

lazy sunday afternoon
chochlate covered berries
sun soaked raisins
warm tangerine juice on warmly kissed skin
how beautiful to be slipping by under the rushing sun like silk through your fingers.
speak softly, when you speak softly, oh how beautiful, when you speak softly
too soon, too soon, the afternoon passes when you are near.
when your breath touches my ear, cabernet colours stains the sky and all beneath.
fly me away and meet me on the other side.
dreams of you make me pass the night.
anoint my honey skin

lost in your heartbeats
your words lost in your sound
your sound lost in mine
mine i cannot even hear now
as the bird on the flowering branch, trills a song, hidden between the leaves and so all one sees is the flower which moves and the sound which moves it and know in our hearts the thought which makes the bird sings and brings the scene alive...intermingling the thought, the sound and the song...to make a memory.

sorry sadness

take my hand, i don't quite know how to say...goodbye...its hard to say but hey if i lay here with you, if i just lay here for a while would it make it easier...we watch time marking shadows on the ceiling, time marking shadows across our hearts...nothing more to say, just stop with the lies now...shhhuuusssh!!!
....you might not believe it but i'm sorry...sad to say i'm sorry...sad to say i'm gone...sad to say but its never over....goodbye