Wednesday, October 26, 2005

3times55

He said

I, imagine
Your breath
Sweet and scented
Intermingled
With mine

I imagine
Your fingers
Soft and supple
Interlaced
With mine

I imagine
Your lips
Slightly parted
Waiting
For mine

I said
Sweet sir
Your imagination
Flows like the
Rhine

But I’ll never
Be thine
So go and suckle
On
Gherkins
Pickled in
Brine

Fuchsia chiffon dress
Handkerchief hemline
Only for 55

Prada gloves
Sumptuous
merely 55

Slim volume
Of 18th century verse
To be had for 55

Shortbread
With aromatic coffee
Just 55

Mobile recharge
Also available
For 55

Tickets to
Dharamsla
Can be arranged
For 55

Rock to
Coldplay
At 55

Pretty woman
At Hour by 55

I will love you for reasons more than 55
I will love you in ways more than 55
I will love you for years more than 55, god willing, health permitting
But if you mess with me, I will undo you in ways far more than 55
Your pieces will swish with uncle Corleone’s fishes

31 comments:

sirbarrett said...

HAHA! I loved this highly coercive warning! Good refusal. You are not one to mess with. What he said sounded like a tantric technique which involves the mingling of the spirits as one hovers over their lover teasingly without touching. Only breath would travers the space between to communicate, though your words are far more explicit, and you dissolve his imagination in one quick stroke while giving him something to think about.

DeeM said...

Oh my god! i love this! i love the turn it takes. very, very cool Gulnaz!

gautami tripathy said...

Cool!

Really liked this!

One good writer!

Geetanjali said...

Oh - I Liketh! Very Much!

Anonymous said...

sometimes I think you're just a twisted poet filled with hate.

Misreflection said...

Hey Tiger ..I hope you have the support of the mob on this one.. :)
Careful now....

RuKsaK said...

Whoosh! I felt my hair fly back with the last line - superbly done.

mermaid said...

First of all anon, I think you may be filled with hate. Help me understand how Glunaz' lovely words make you think of hate? (This ought to be interesting...) And why remain anon, if you have nothing to hide???

Gulnaz, my dear, brilliant, once again:)

gulnaz said...

sirbarrett- i hope it was not too offensive, hehe. :)

DeeM- oh just your regular ups and downs of life, am glad you liked it ;)

Gautami- awww!! you are sweet!! thanks!

Geetanjali- am glad my young lady it meets with enjoyment in your pretty mind for i was unsure about the parts which are so kind. hehe

Anon- you have me intrigued....it seems you are a regular visitor but it also seems that you do not like what i write so i wander why you visit this space at all. well, somehow the idea of being a 'twisted poet filled with hate' is not too bad, quite dramatic and grand, you are making too much out of me, am not worthy of your interest. :) am sorry if i have offended you in anyway.

Missy- bruahaha! :))

RuksaK- thanks, glad you liked it! :)

Mermaid- thanks for standing up for me! :) it doesnt matter...but yeah even i'm curious.
thanks....you are just too kind to me. :)

Tomas said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tomas said...

wow.... my jaw is hurting from this overwhelming grin of sarcasm that seems to have enveloped me after reading this piece... you do tend to twist my brain on occasion, my friend...
(but then that is just one of the many reasons i adore you)

sirbarrett said...

No, definitely not too offensive! Bring on the offense! It was expressive! I enjoyed it. I think people need a good fight, or at least the threat of one. Very human, playful, witty, curious, and adventurous. I think the goal seems stronger to love properly, when someone demands it with respect. That is hot. :)

. : A : . said...

Good humour twists in each of them. I like this new style.

:-)

Thanks for taking it up. Have added this as a link to my 55 word post.

southpaw said...

Very uniquely done!!!! and lsat but not the least...***I will love you for reasons more than 55
I will love you in ways more than 55
I will love you for years more than 55, god willing, health permitting
But if you mess with me, I will undo you in ways far more than 55
Your pieces will swish with uncle Corleone’s fishes***Loved this artistic warning...:)

Just A Human said...

Hmmm.. I wonder... I would like to explore the 56th reason and the 56th way - but ofcourse in the 56th year... till then I am busy!

Cocaine Jesus said...

Hmmmm. Acid tongue spits its vitriol. Thank Christ I'm not 55.

the woman said...

This is what I'd say, Cool shit! I like it!

Guess what, it sorta reminded me of chicken 65... okay,okay, I'm kidding.

Have fun, love.

Casablanca said...

Wow, someone's gone on a 55 marathon! But I liked the second one the most... and please tell me, where can we buy Prada gloves for just 55??

Anonymous said...

Hi Gulnaz,

Re. 3times55, I tried to post a comment but for some reason couldn't - some technical glitch I guess, never happened before. I was just going to say the following - feel free to paste it to your comments if you want -

That was definitely interesting and different! I do have some concerns for your relationships though - raking guys with you nails till they bleed, locking them in cages. And here in "3times," you do sound quite stern and demanding.

What about Kenny Rogers' "Three Times a Lady?" Every listen to that? It might mellow you out. I don't know if he used 55 words or not.

Of course I'm kidding, and like your stuff...

Paul

gulnaz said...

Tomas- do i do that...awww. :) but well, you like that, so....:) thanks!! hugs!

sirbarrett- thanks, i was begining to think maybe i made a mistake. :) and you are right, its not good to allow yourself to be treated poorly. ;)

.:A:. - mission accomplished. :)
sorry i forgot to add the link to your post, will do.

southpaw- well now! :))
thanks!

Just a Human- well since i was limited to 55 but then why stop at 56. :) keep coming. :))

CJ- oooh was i that bad! ;)

woman- what is chicken 65? glad you liked it, was in a stupid mood. :)

Casablanca- hehe have been reading the 55-worders by others and boy am so impressed! still, glad you liked my silly stuff and hey in the prada one, i omitted the units of currency, dollars, dimes, cents, centimes, minutes, paise...:)

Paul- sometimes blogger acts up and really am such an angel, all velvet and soft purrs but well i got my sharp side too. ;)
am glad you like my stuff, thanks.

Rama The Drama said...

The last 55 packs a pacino punch!

transience said...

i am welcomed back by such mastery. wonderful, gulnaz. the art lives in you.

Anil said...

lol!...such fun this poem was to read...especially the last line...damn good! an interesting take on the 55 word meme...

Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Really good punchline funny,

gulnaz said...

Ramchi- pacino punch...that's a cool name for somthing made from vodka and all the rest of the stuff littering the bar, better get a copyright on that one buddy. :) thanks!

transi- oh sweetie!!! what can i say, you are the sweetest!! mwaaah!

Anil- hehe am a funny gal!

Sue- heeehee, made me laugh too and i had a de niro-meets-pacino-smirk on my face as i wrote it. :)

finnegan said...

I didn't know that Don Corleone's fish were gay.

You seem in a light-hearted mood with these few 55's.

Cocaine, don't press your luck. You will be 55 before too long. And then 65 and counting to 75 and nearly dead but not before the decay at 85. I will be here waiting for you and Gulnaz if I'm not swimming with Corleone's fishies.

gulnaz said...

finn- LMAO!! your comments always justify my awaiting them. :))

venus said...

I like it when u proclaimed:
"I will love you for reasons more than 55
I will love you in ways more than 55
I will love you for years more than 55, god willing, health permitting"

pallavi said...

beautiful.. just cool !!

Anonymous said...

Venus, Pallavi- thanks guys!! :)

SilverMoon said...

WOW! Sense of humor and wit combined with superb writing. I'm hooked!